A return… 3 November 2009
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I have kept away from here for a long time now. It hasn’t been an easy time…
I haven’t been keeping tabs on this, other than to reply to emails I have received, or comments people have left.
Seeing Christmas on the front page and with Christmas fast approaching, I thought I should do something to correct this.
I’m sorry I don’t have any inspiration to write at the moment, but I hope to have something here soon.
Josh
Calling for contributions 28 November 2008
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Hi all.
I was hoping to find people to help contribute with content and discussion.
If you’re interested, please drop me an email (can be found on the about page).
Josh
7 months on, has anyone found this site useful? 27 November 2008
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RIP Mark Priestley 28 August 2008
Posted by sydcatholic80 in Uncategorized.Tags: depression, news, suicide
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Well, this morning I felt like titling this post “Disappointed” with the body “…that I woke up…”, because it was honestly how I felt. I went to sleep last night hoping for that outcome.
I guess however, things were quickly put into perspective. In the news today, an actor in a popular Australian medical drama “All Saints” was found dead, reportedly of suicide due to depression.
He was only 32.
Rest in peace Mark.
Mark Priestley 09/08/1976 - 28/08/2008
Disconnected… 27 August 2008
Posted by sydcatholic80 in Uncategorized.Tags: depression, despair, isolation, loneliness, sadness
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Just something I was feeling, thought I should write it down.
How many of us go through life with blinkers on?
It is a complete shock when you fall off the road, and when you pick yourself up again, if you have had an epiphany, all of a sudden you find you don’t fit in anywhere anymore. You look at the road you fell off, and know that you can’t get back on there, and you don’t really want to in any case (putting aside nostalgia, romanticism or regret). You could if you wanted to choose ignorance again, and pretend you didn’t discover life wasn’t meant to be that way, but otherwise, the past is closed to you.
Alas when you look around, there is no where else for you to go either.
That is where I am now.
I have no idea which way to turn, or in what direction I should be looking in.
There doesn’t seem to be any place for me to turn to.
This is isolation. This is loneliness.
Plug for a new blog… 12 August 2008
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Hi all,
I just thought I would give a plug to a fellow blogger who is starting up a blog of his own.
Josh
Loneliness…Compassion 10 August 2008
Posted by sydcatholic80 in Uncategorized.Tags: catholic, compassion, faith, loneliness, religion
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In the 6 months that I have been reading widely and talking with many different people, one fact has become apparent: sometimes no matter how many friends you have around you, how loving a family you have, even someone who loves you like no other, even your own strong faith in God, but sometimes even with all that you can still feel alone.
It is very confusing. I don’t understand how this can be, and yet it is. I have never been so alone in all my life. Try as I might, I have had real trouble shaking this. I have prayed hard. Many friends and family are praying hard for me. I keep myself around people as much as possible. And yet, these feelings persist.
My life is floating. I am unable to live life as I did before, and confusion has set it. The path ahead seems very isolated and alone.
Those who are not afflicted by this kind of loneliness are blessed. But they can never understand truly what it is. Until I arrived at this point, I too was blissfully ignorant of how it felt, or what it meant.
Many lack any sort of compassion, resorting to trite responses, blaming the individual for their loneliness as if that individual made a purposeful decision to be/feel lonely.
When I say that some people lack compassion, I do not say that they do this on purpose either. Compassion is learnt. Those who have the “perfect happy” life, and live in complete comfort all their lives will never understand the suffering of another. Compassion is learned through experience.
Perhaps thats why Christ understands us so well. He became one of us. He experienced loneliness, isolation, temptation, deep sorrow, fear, doubt, scorn, anger, pain, despair. A whole gamut of emotions. And he lived amongst all types in the society of his time.
What to take out of this little sermon? I write this stuff, but I still don’t understand it. I know very little.
All I can do, is to continue to have faith…
What is the meaning of life? 27 July 2008
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On the merry-go-round that is life, you are likely pass this question many times, but somehow there are times when when we seem to hit this point more than we do any other. Like I read in many sci-fi books as a teenager, I’m caught in a time-warp.
What set’s these episodes in motion, I still don’t know.
When life holds a knife to your throat, what keeps life going? That whole thought is quite a paradox. The only thing that can take life, is life itself.
For the first time in my life, I hate winter. This year it is long and bleak. It’s ground-hog day, again. I wanted to post a picture of how I am feeling, but even google images fails to find me a picture of how I feel.
When foundations are knocked out, it’s hard to fix. Can you rebuild, or is it condemned to demolition? What is left to do?
After 28 years on this Earth, what does one show for it?
I guess one has to have faith, and even the best have moments where their faith wavers.
Life is a test, and unfortunately you just can’t turn to the back of the book to find the answers.
Back to normal…well almost. 23 June 2008
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Well, I might be back to normal schedule now.
University is now over until the beginning of August.
A few things have caught my eye over the last few weeks, and I have a few ideas in draft which I will be posting in the next few days, as well as discussing my recent participation in the Courage On Line forum, as well as the Catholic Forum.
Thank you for those that have been reading and left me nice messages. 
Post soon.
Josh
Study break 4 June 2008
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Hi all.
I know haven’t written in a few days, so I thought I would let you know that I am still here. End of semester commitments and exam preparation have been keeping me occupied. This has been a very difficult 3 months, and I will be lucky to scrape through, but I know with His help I can make it.
I would ask you keep me in your prayers the next two weeks.
God bless,
Josh
